[6 Minute Read]
You're probably here because you've had a shit day and you just want to make it all go away: The anxiety, the dread, the anger, the second-guessing all your words and actions. From the moment you got out of bed, it felt like the universe was out to give you a swift kick in the ass.
Now, nothing can lift your mood. Everything is irritating. You've given someone the finger at least once, and maybe you've been a bit of an asshole to someone else because your bad mood just can't be contained and it's infecting everything around you.
Bad days are part of life, and existing in a fast-paced, productivity-focused, multitasking, technologically advanced society makes us all over-stimulated and stressed from time to time.
Below I share what I do when I have a bad day, including the biggest tip that's helped me. Let me know in the comments if these help, or if you have other ideas!
1. Take a deep breath (or 5)
Yeah, yeah. I know this tip sounds incredibly cliche, but there's a physiological reason deep breaths help when you're feeling tense. Deep breathing is a surprisingly powerful tool for calming your nervous system, grounding yourself, and breaking the cycle of stress.
Close your eyes and take a slow, deep breath through your nose. Hold for a moment. Slowly exhale through your mouth. Repeat this several times. With each exhale, imagine you’re letting go of some of that tension.
Deep breathing doesn’t instantly fix everything, but it creates the space you need to *think* more clearly, make better choices, and regain a sense of calm. It’s like hitting a reset button for your mood and mindset.
2. Ask for support
On a bad day, one of the most powerful things you can do is reach out. Whether it’s a quick chat with a friend, a family member, or a colleague, connecting with others can remind you that you’re not alone. Human connection is one of the best remedies for loneliness and stress. Leaning on your support system can help you feel validated, cared for, and understood.
- Pick up the phone and call a friend or loved one. You don’t have to talk about what’s bothering you if you don’t want to—sometimes, just chatting about something light and easy can provide a sense of normalcy.
- If talking isn’t what you need right now, send a quick text or use social media to reach out to someone who’s supportive.
- If you’re really struggling, don’t hesitate to reach out for professional support—whether that’s a therapist, counselor, or helpline. It’s okay to ask for help.
3. Slow doooown
When you finally get a chance to, slow down. Your nervous system is buzzing with all the "bad day energy" you've been swimming in — the ruminating, the negative social interactions, the venting, the swearing — and it needs a chance to come down from the frazzled state it's in.
Throw on some mellow music, find a funny or relaxing YouTube video or a creative activity, and take 10 minutes to just chill the f*ck out. A few minutes of laughter can release endorphins and help reset your mood. I like to watch first person walking tours on YouTube that take you through beautiful or peaceful places, like this snowy night walk in Seoul, a walk through Mykonos, Greece, or a stroll through a charming European Christmas Market. These videos feel like escaping to another place, but they also help me find destinations I'd love to travel to someday! I also like to reminisce about happy moments. I'll look at photos from vacations or throw on my favorite game soundtracks and draw for 15 minutes, just giving my brain some time to "turn off".
If you DO go for a walk, don't do it in a place that's just going to make you feel shittier (like along a busy road without a sidewalk, where there's lots of construction or noisy traffic). Pick something like a nice park, hiking trail, or a quiet neighborhood.
4. Be kind to yourself
You wouldn’t be harsh with a friend who was having a bad day, so why do we often treat ourselves so much more critically? On days when things aren’t going well, practicing self-compassion can be incredibly healing. It reminds you that you’re allowed to have moments of struggle, and it’s okay to take a breather.
- Avoid self-criticism and negative self-talk. Instead, say things to yourself like, “It’s okay to have a tough day,” or “I’m doing the best I can, and that’s enough.”
- Give yourself permission to slow down. If you need a break, take it. If you need to rest, rest. Self-compassion often means allowing yourself to just *be*, without the pressure to fix everything immediately.
When you practice kindness toward yourself, you not only help ease the discomfort of a bad day—you also build resilience for the future.
And the most important tip of all...
5: Stop trying to make it a good day.
That's right. Accept that you had a bad day — that we ALL have bad days. Let the shittiness of the day wash over you. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking, “I shouldn’t feel this way.” In our culture, we’re often expected to mask or power through negative emotions, to “stay positive” and “look on the bright side.” While optimism is important, it’s equally important to honor your feelings and acknowledge that it’s okay to have bad days. You don't need to fix everything. You don't need to fix your bad day.
Instead, congratulate yourself. You made it through a shitty day. You've taken part in something that's part of every human being's experience on this planet. Today, you get to be kind to yourself. You get to acknowledge what an awful day was. Give yourself a goddamned hug. Bitch about it to a friend. Say your favorite swear words. And then — let it go. You've done all you can. It's not your job to control this day, or change it. Let it be what it is. Then let it go on its way. Remind yourself how resilient you are and that you can do better tomorrow.
Tomorrow’s a New Day
No matter how bad today feels, it’s important to remind yourself that tomorrow is a fresh start, and today's bad vibes don't have to carry over to tomorrow. Bad days happen to all of us—what matters most is how we respond to them. With a little patience, self-compassion, and the right tools, you can transform a tough day into a valuable learning experience and an opportunity to build resilience.
